Some of the Best (and Funniest) Golfer Excuses

We All Have Reasons for What is About to Take Place...

If you golf, you use excuses. It is just a simple fact. There are lots of reasons for this, but the main reason is that executing the perfect swing and result is extremely rare. That, coupled with the fact that a golfer's ego is a very fragile and delicate thing, therefore, we will say anything to distract our playing partners from the often embarrassing truth!

There are a number of great excuses that I have heard over the years and we have compiled a list of some of the most often heard/used excuses out there for your enjoyment and, perhaps your arsenal.

Admittedly, I have used a high percentage of these over the years, but they were all perfectly legitimate :)

Here’s a collection of the funniest (and most often-heard) golf excuses — the kind golfers pull out after a bad shot, a bad round, or just to cover up the fact that golf is hard:

Classic Swing & Shot Excuses

• “The wind picked up right as I swung.”

• “My glove slipped.”

• “The sun was in my eyes.” (even if it’s cloudy)

• “I never play well with rental clubs.”

• “That was a practice swing… just a little too close to the ball.”

• “The ball moved in my stance.”

• “I’m between clubs here.”

  
  

Equipment Blame Game

• “These greens are way too slow/fast.”

• “This driver has no pop left in it.”

• “My grips are too slick.”

• “I should’ve re-spiked my shoes.”

• “Range balls messed up my swing.”

Course & Conditions

• “These bunkers aren’t raked properly.”

• “This rough is unfairly thick.”

• “The pin placement is ridiculous.”

• “I never play well on this course.”

• “Who designed this hole? A sadist?”

Physical / Mental

• “I didn’t stretch.”

• “Back tightened up on me.”

• “I skipped breakfast.”

• “Too many swing thoughts in my head.”

• “I haven’t played in forever.” (usually said by someone who plays twice a week)

Just Plain Funny

• “That squirrel distracted me.”

• “Somebody coughed in my backswing.”

• “I hit that exactly where I aimed… I just aimed wrong.”

• “I was trying that new move I saw on YouTube.”

• “I always save my good shots for the range.”

• “You know, I usually birdie this hole.”

• “That was a good miss.”